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I recently found out about Touchless Toilet Technology from Kohler—a way to flush just by holding a hand over the tank lid, where a sensor has been placed. It’s really cool, and it seems like it would have been an excellent potty tool when I was training Max. Back then, both of us needed all the motivation and temptation that we could get. Max was day trained at school for a long time before he finally became so at home, at age 9. One key thing I learned: Parents have to be just as ready as the kids are. Potty-training a kid with special needs requires dedication, and if you’re not diligent about whatever tactic you try, your child won’t get into the groove.
I asked special needs parents on social media for their best tricks and tactics for potty training a child with special needs. May the flush be with you!
ENCOURAGEMENT
“What finally worked was using star stickers on a chart. Nicholas got to put one on every time he went. It seemed to really work for him that way (even though I still had to more or less force him onto the seat each time).”—Sarah L.
“The Clean Pants Check. We did the usual sitting on the potty 30 minutes after eating or drinking, but instead of checking every 30 minutes thereafter to see if he was ‘dirty,’ we checked to see if he was CLEAN, then rewarded him. He is autistic and was not potty-trained at 4.5 years old. It only took one month with this method.”—Peggy M.
“Lukas is autistic. We did lots of modeling and letting him see us go. We are not a shy family. No pressure. A couple of months after turning four, he just went in and did it. That was it.”—Rebecca D.
“I put a Pull-up on over a pair of panties. She felt the wetness, which ultimately motivated her not to go in her pants, and I had the leak protection of a Pull-up.”—Crystal S.
“My son was very stubborn. Making him responsible helped. He had to get the Pull-ups from the drawer and throw them away. I bought toddler wipes so he could more easily clean himself. Eventually I think it just came down to…it was time. He was 9.”—Angela S.
“For nighttime training, two words: alarm underwear!“—Melissa M.
“For my grandson, I picked a weekend, I talked about it with him and told him when he got home from school on Friday, he would be able to wear Big Boy underwear that he picked out the week prior (Buzz Lightyear)…. The two days of potty training gave him the ability to understand what holding it meant, and he had had to tell somebody. He has had a few accidents, but we never went back to diapers. He will be 9 tomorrow and completely potty trained. They said he would never accomplish being potty trained…. HA!”—Barbara D.
EDUCATION
“Avakid’s app See Me Go Potty. Seriously, worked like a charm.”—Faye C.
“We used potty-training DVDs and huge celebrations: woo-hoos, dancing, making a complete jack@$$ of ourselves.”—Devon B.
“Learning to point to icon on his speech app led to being willing to sign/verbalize needing to go. Didn’t happen until age 12 after trying many other ways.”—Peggy R.
“Repetition. We just did it over and over and over and over (you get it) until it stuck. Oh, and Reece’s Pieces.”—Patty H.
ENTERTAINMENT
“I bought those little tablets that you throw in the water of the toilet, they come in all different colors. I guess it’s kind of like target practice: Once they pee on the little tablet it starts to dissolve nd turn the toilet water whatever color the tablet is.”—Stacy S.
“A giraffe puppet trained mine! They wouldn’t do it for me, but they’d do it for the puppet.”—Kristen R.
“For my daughter, I painted her toenails while she sat on the potty. She was fascinated by watching me do it and it would keep her still and help her stay put for a few minutes.”—Rosie R.
“There is this funny song about poop in Brazil, with a video clip and everything. I used to sing it for my son, making voices and faces, while he tried to do number 2. It worked really well. This is the link. Yeah, it’s a poop singing!”—Andrea B.
REWARDS/BRIBERY!
“He wanted a doctor kit so I put a brand new one on top of the entertainment center out of reach and said he had to use the potty and get out of diapers to have it. Every time he asked for it I just said, ‘You know what you need to do.’ I didn’t push him to use the potty. One day he decided he wanted it enough and did it. He was almost 5.”—Jennifer R.
“Had a treat box in the bathroom filled with cheap toys my son loves from Walmart and Big Lots! When he did his thing, he would get to choose one.”—Kay T.
“I used Daniel’s favorite, M&M’s, plus I kept a potty chair in the family room for emergencies!”—April G.
“A Lalaloopsy mini doll as a reward for poop on the potty. I bought an eight-pack for $44. Best money I ever spent. After two years of potty training for poop, this finally seemed to work at the age of 6.”—Christie C.
“I told my son with Sensory Processing Disorder that we couldn’t go to Disney World the following week, because Mickey didn’t let kids his age who couldn’t use the potty into Disney World. I only told him this because his OT and I agreed he was not doing it purely out of stubbornness, at that point. I wish I had done it sooner because 48 hours later, he was completely day-trained.”—KLW
CUE: LET IT GO
“Nothing worked. And we tried EVERYTHING! He just had to be ready. We finally just gave up, told him he could stop trying and wear Pull-ups as long as he needed to. He self-trained the next day. He was 4 and we’d been trying for two years. I think just stepping back and taking the pressure off, letting him set the agenda and be in control of the process was key for him. He has Asperger’s.”—Angela C.
“Wine. #formom.”—Katrina M.
From my other blog:
A happy ending to the toilet-training saga
Potty training boot camp
Image of child looking at toilet via Shutterstock